Buy it now!!
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OVERALL RATING--3-- |
Apr 18, 2009
Weirdsville.
Buy it now!!
The Wizard of Gore (2007)
The movie’s main focus is on a young man named Edmund Bigelow that’s played by Kip Pardue. We don’t really know much about the man at the start of the film, and unfortunately we don’t learn much more as time goes on. We know he survives off a trust fund, which explains why you never see him do anything remotely like a job, and that he passes his time putting out a small newspaper that deals with the strange and occult. We do learn that he has a girlfriend named by Maggie that’s played by Bijou Phillips. We learn even less about her than we do the main character, but for some reason it just felt like we didn’t need to learn anymore than we did. Crispin Glover also stars, but more about him in a minute.
The movie start’s with Ed’s curiosity about weird things leading him to a magic show featuring Montag the Magnificent. This is Glover’s first chance to shine, and if you’re looking for a character that’s a little too over the top, he delivers. Glover’s character is also my main reason for not liking this movie. He’s not in every scene like Pardue is, but his scenes are so annoying that by the end you’re really glad you didn’t see any more of him than you had to. I was personally ready to shoot him by his second time on camera, and there was about an hour of film left if I remember right. His costume consists of a white suit that for some reason has a huge bulge where his package would be. This isn’t something I think anyone would really notice, except they make a habit of using shots where this is in your face, and you really can’t miss it.
The magic show consists of Montag’s helper coming out and warming up the crowd through some pretty cool FX, topping everything off by biting off the head of a rat. At this point the crowd get’s disgusted and someone stand’s up and starts to leave (It’s always a suicide girl). It’s right at this second that Glover appears, and suddenly has the person up on stage about to perform some kind of magic trick using her. The formula is simple, and repeated I think 5 or 6 time throughout the film. Montag pulls someone up on stage, give a little speech, appears to kill the person, and then shows them to be just fine. Everything would be just fine were it not for the fact that every time he does this, the girl is found dead the next day. What follows this first example is a never ending cycle, with some private eye elements thrown in to liven things up a bit. It’s at this point that the film starts to get hard to follow, as we’re suddenly dealing with things like mind control drugs, Vietnam war stories, and a repeated effect that looks like it came out of the Matrix. I won’t ruin anything major, but I will say the big plot twist at the end is sort of a letdown, and that at least I felt like I had seen it done somewhere before, but I wasn’t able to place where or what movie. When they finally do explain everything, I was able to follow what was happening up until the very end of the movie, but I wouldn’t be surprised if quite a few people out there will finish the movie and just scratch their heads about the whole deal.
My final thoughts on the film: Acting-it was pretty solid all around, but Glover’s character just made me want to shoot myself, and he doesn’t let up anywhere in the movie, so I guess you can give him credit for being consistent throughout.
Humor-Not really too much to speak of, I can’t really think of any time at all when I laughed actually.
Blood/Gore-Well given the title you would expect this to be a high score, but it’s only average. The title made me think of rivers of blood, and sadly the gore is really confined to a few select parts of the movie, other that that we really don’t see too much.
Nudity-Again not as much as I would have hoped, but I feel that’s because the bottom of the cover promotes the fact that we see suicide girls in the film, and when I thought of suicide girls I thought of naked women. Sadly, this is just as reserved as the blood is, although you do seem to see the two mostly at the same time.
FX-I have to give this a good score, as the film did have some pretty good FX throughout. Any movie that has a girl getting her chest cavity opened up and makes me think that’s really has done it’s job well.
Plot twist-Like I said, I felt like I had seen it before. That aside it is a pretty descent attempt at something you might expect from M. Night Shyamalan, although it will be pretty hard to follow unless you were really paying attention throughout the movie.
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OVERALL RATING--2.5-- |
Apr 15, 2009
Cannibal Cheerleader Camp (2008)
Scene 1 starts out with a cute chick (a stripper) blazing up a joint in the bathroom stall while awaiting her turn on stage. She gets the call, and while gazing in the mirror, someone comes from behind and slices her throat.
Scene 2 takes us to the camp where we meet the tough chick (and her shotgun and knife), two blondies (which seem rather close), the shy, nerdy girl, and another blonde chick. One by one, they get plinked off in slasher movie fashion, but not before throwing in a zombie twist, and an ending where evil once again prevails.
As with most horror shorts, several things remain unanswered: who is the killer? where did he/she come from? why does he/she kill? And, the biggest question, why was this called Cannibal Cheerleader Camp, when there isn’t the slightest inkling of a cheerleader present? Maybe there’s something I overlooked, maybe there’s something beyond the sex, boobs, lesbo shower scene, cute chicks, and blood that I missed? Or maybe, it was just a cool title that couldn’t be let go? Who really knows, but I liked it, and although it had all the major elements of a good horror movie crunched into a short running time, I’d really like to see it expanded into a longer feature. Now maybe a full-length feature isn't warranted, but something with a more character and plot depth, more great visuals, more explanations, and more of the essentials (gore, sex, and nudity).
Thanks to Paul at Ten Sundays for sending this. I really hope to see a longer feature in the near future, and if it’s not Cannibal Cheerleader Camp, then I’m sure it’ll be just as entertaining.
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OVERALL RATING--3.5-- |
Apr 10, 2009
Zombie Cheerleading Camp (2008)
Three chicks get a flat tire on their way to cheerleading camp, and of course, there’s no cell phone signal. Lucky for them, three dudes come along and offer their help, getting them to their destination, and promising to fix the tire later. We notice almost immediately what the camp has to offer: an overbearing coach, her overzealous gay son (the best male cheerleader ever), a gay chef, and a perverted caretaker.
While "the dudes" are on their way to a fishing hole, one gets attacked by what appears to be a rabid squirrel. Thinking it was just a fluke occurrence, and only later realizing it’s magnitude, they bandage the wound and continue with their day. They run into the same chicks later, who just got through swimming (skinny dipping), and make plans to hook up that evening for blunts and brews. A little bedtime fun occurs, and one chick is bitten, thus starting the zombie onslaught. One cheerleader infects another, then the caretaker, and on and on. You can pretty much guess how the rest of the story goes, so I won’t regurgitate details you’ve seen before, but will say, that even though there’s really nothing new here to the zombie genre, there is a decent kill scene with a chainsaw, a set of boobs (same girl numerous times), and campy humor, including a funny scene with a chick playing with a severed head.
You can definitely tell that ZCC's creators are fans of the genre, but a major flaw is in the fluctuation of the audio, which jumped from, Shit, where’s the earplugs?, to Where’s my hearing aid? Other than that, it offered a nice dose of decent looking chicks (in and out of cheerleading attire), a nice helping of blood and gore, and a few laughs, even though more boobs could have been thrown in for good measure (I’m a perv, I know).
On a side note, I found it quite interesting that although I was approved for a screener, before shipping it, I was sent a short questionnaire in order to make sure I was in the "right viewing audience" and wouldn’t hammer them on the review. I totally understand, having been involved in a very, very low budget zombie film myself (Undead on Arrival), but hey, not everyone is going to like your film, and any publicity is good publicity. But, here’s what I was asked, and if you’re interested in my answers, just let me know:
a.. How old are you?
b.. Are you sensitive to gay humor?
c.. What is your favorite Troma movie?
d.. What is your favorite funny film?
e.. What is your favorite low budget film?
For fans of indie movies, and more specifically low budget zombie flicks, this one’s for you. Granted, there are a slew of them out there, but Jon and his crew at JAF Productions, have a finished product they can be proud of, and it's sure to gain a following. Jon, thanks for sending me a copy, and I look forward to your next film.
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OVERALL RATING--2.5-- |
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