What better way to break out of a viewing slump that to watch a Fulci film, but rather than take the mainstream path and re-watch Zombie, The Beyond, or City of the Living Dead (recently released on Blu Ray, woo hoo!), I chose a lesser known title, Red Monks. While Fulci didn’t direct this, he’s credited as a producer, and with his name plastered all over the artwork, for sake of argument, we’ll call it a Fulci film, until proven otherwise. This has yet to be released as a Region 1, so I popped my PAL version (which I had yet to watch) in my trusty-dusty multi-region Daewoo, but it didn’t play. I’m like, Dammit, I need Fucli, and NOW!, so luckily I had a back-up, a Philips, and it fulfilled my need.
Make no mistake, the opening sequences scream “Italian film” with the fabulous scenery and atmosphere, but is it Fulci’s? A guy recently inherited some land and a castle from his parents, which he plans on turning into a hotel. As he roams the property, he sees and follows a naked chick, only to have his head lopped off with a sword while he gawks at her naked behind.
50 years earlier, a husband brings home his new wife to the castle, but rather than immediately bedding her, he runs downstairs to tell The Red Monks the news, and finds out that they want his beau as a virgin sacrifice. He kind of shrugs it off, and rather than laying the pipe and exempting her from her fate, he decides to screw the maid. Nearly alone in a big house, what’s a wife to do but explore, and that she does, stumbling upon the Monks, and fainting in fear. Was it a dream or reality? Only time will tell, but it’s apparent that something isn’t right, as she’s ravaged by some guy while painting in the field, she finds a severed head in the picnic basket, her husband is a distant relative of someone who killed the Red Monks leader, and she gets possessed by “the curse,” and then beheads her husband, thus fulfilling the prophecy.
So, is it a Fulci film, you ask? I have a hard time believing it is with the fake tarantulas, lack of gore, off-screen kills, and somewhat incoherent story, then again, we’d be talking about late 80’s Fulci, which is a far cry from Lucio in his prime. I don’t doubt that he had some hand in it, either overseeing or contributing, but it looks like whatever involvement he did have, he walked away washing his hands of it, because if he truly was invested, he would have taken over the set and it would be a much darker and gorier film. Sure, most of his movies in his later years sucked, but I still have a fondness for House of Clocks and Demonia.
And, when you can’t dazzle them with brilliance, you have to titillate with nudity, so 4 sets of boobs and a couple of butts are thrown in for good measure. I kept hoping this would play out like an Eyes Wide Shut sort of film, even though this was done 11 years earlier, but aside from hoods and hoo-hoos, it was nothing like it. Still, the marketing team did a great job of sucking me in with the trailer, cover, and Fulci references, but the likelihood of giving it another watch is unlikely, as it took me nearly 3 years to get to it anyway. This is one time I’ll have to say stick to what you know, and pop in a Fulci classic instead. If you must venture out, just expect to be less than dazzled, but pick up a copy of Paura-Lucio Fucli Remembered Vol. 1 and get first-hand accounts of the maestro at his best.
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