A family of three are driving home, when they hit glass in the road, and the car goes out of control and hits a tree. Mom and son seem fine, but father is either badly hurt, or dead. Mom runs out in the middle of the road to wave down a car, which hits her dead-on. The driver then stops, gets out, grabs a rock, bashes her head in, and then loads her up and drives away. Meanwhile, little Johnny witnesses it all while hiding in the nearby trees, but then runs to find help.
While Reno and his chick are relaxing on the side of the road after doing the deed, a couple of frat guys come along, beat him up, rob them, and attempt to have her give them oral gratification. Another car (Antonio and his wife) comes along, and Antonio pulls over, rescues the girl (Aurora), and then pulls out his gat and tells the frat boys to scat. Reno and Aurora are then taken to their house, and while Antonio tries to comfort her, his wife doctors Reno. But, just when Antonio makes his move on Aurora, his son, Giullo (pronounced Goolio), comes running around the corner. Immediately, you realize that something isn’t quite right with Giullo, because he appears to have fangs and a blood-like substance around his mouth.
Antonio goes to check on Reno, but then comes back with a syringe and some liquid sure to knock Aurora out. She makes a run for it, and finds Reno tied up in Giullo’s room. She jumps out the window, scales the front gate, and treks down the road in her Converse Cons, while Antonio drives after her. When she sees his car, she b-lines into the woods, and after hearing groaning and growling behind her, she makes tracks again. She stumbles across an RV, which appears to be a savior, but is inhabited by something you may have seen in The Hills Have Eyes, and are Antonio’s kin.
The frat guys run out of gas, and when they pull over, they hear screams and decide to investigate. Aurora is taken back to Antonio’s house, and the frat guys follow, only to pistol whip Antonio with his own gun, and then have their lives taken by “the family.”
The final scenes beg the viewer for compassion, but instead, made me think of After Dark’s movie The Hamiltons, and the little brother they kept locked up. The tie-in with the first of the film, is that the little boy (and his mother), were used as meals for the vampire son. This is where you’ll see one of the most ridiculous props used in a movie. The little boy is still alive, but his arms and legs are severed. Yeah, like I couldn’t tell the kid’s head was coming through the back of the prop and the body was a puppet. In the end, Giullo attacks his mom, and Aurora goes running away.
Really, the only similarities to TCM are a chainsaw and a cannibal family. Had they kept it to just the family of three, it might have been more entertaining, because once the mutants entered the picture, my interest lessened. But, the stand-out scene is where one of the frat guys pops the mutants second neck, a boil-like thing, and like an overdue festered pimple, it explodes all over his face. Quite distasteful, and maybe even puke-worthy for the squeamish, but reminiscent of scenes from Street Trash.
Sure, there are chicks in bras and panties, but even had real nudity been present, it still wouldn’t have saved this flick. One of the cheesiest lines I’ve heard is something to the effect of, “I want you to draw while we make love…” Yeah, like I want my girl to concentrate on something other than me trying to please her. Heck, if that’s the case, I’d have her washing dishes or cooking dinner while I boned her.
Many times, dubbing takes away from a film, and I often wonder how much better it would be reading subtitles. Granted, had this not been dubbed, it probably wouldn’t have made it any better, but I guess GHU thought that the general public would steer away from it, and others in the series, if they were presented in their original language. This just shows how stupid most American’s are when it comes to film watching, like the ones I deal with on a day-to-day basis when it comes to widescreen vs. fullscreen, but that's a whole other blog in itself.
I just have to ask, what’s happened to Italian horror? Once the melting pot of originality, exploitation, and erotica, has now been dumbed down to rehashes, regurgitations, and snoozy cinema. This is another crapper in the GHU series, and I only hope that at least one will be worthy enough to make it into my collection for future viewing, rather than watching, hating, and forgetting. Go pick up some Mario or Lamberto Bava, some Fulci, or Dario Argento instead.
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OVERALL RATING--2-- |
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